All posts by Eve Ogden Schaub

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About Eve Ogden Schaub

Serial memoirist Eve O. Schaub lives with her family in Vermont and enjoys performing experiments on them so she can write about it. Author of Year of No Sugar (2014) and Year of No Clutter (2017) and most recently Year of No GARBAGE (2023). Find her on Twitter @Eveschaub IG or eveschaub.com.

A Year of No Sugar: Post 2

Day two of the project and the going is s-l-o-w… which is to say that we are finding sugar everywhere besides on top of the door frames, and if we suddenly found it there too I imagine we’d hardly be surprised.

At breakfast we avoided sugar with success, (hooray!) until afterwards when the kids wanted to open the “Make Your Own Gummis!” kit they got for Christmas… (awww!). That’s right: we didn’t even make it to lunch. I have decided that, by necessity, this coming week will be a “clearing” week, devoted to shedding our sugar like layers of an onion- unlike many households we have no high-fructose corn syrup to get rid of, but cane sugar? Powdered sugar? Brown sugar? Just plain sugar? And I hate wasting perfectly good, perfectly expensive, and in some cases, perfectly labor-intensive food. This doesn’t mean we’ll be consuming the leftover Christmas candy canes- those are going in the freezer- but the last of my homemade bread with maple syrup in it? We’re eating it.

At the same time I have high hopes of not traumatizing the kids too much with this admittedly way-way-outside-the-mainstream plan… Gradually eliminating the sugar in a gentle, phasing manner seems somewhat more appropriate than one day tossing half our pantry into the garbage. Which, despite our label-reading ways, we could very easily do.

So we’ll finish the last of our Bunny Grahams with cane sugar. We’ll make the Gummis today and eat them. When we go to have our grilled cheese sandwich lunch we’ll wince after realizing the organic ketchup, of course, has sugar as it’s third ingredient. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. And yet, I’m hopeful because it’s progress. After mulling this project over for so long in my head, it’s finally begun to inch forward.

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Information About The No Sugar Project

 

A Year of No Sugar – Post 1

It’s New Year’s Day: the day I begin my self-imposed “Year of No Sugar.” I started it off auspiciously, of course, by having breakfast at Rathbun’s Maple Sugar House. Great idea, right? As if struck by a bolt of invisible lightning I stopped dead still, spoon poised mid-air with sudden realization before pausing, sighing, and dumping the sparkling white crystals into my coffee mug swirled with cream. Clearly, I’m still working out the details.

Anyway, I thought, tonight I’m making my “goodbye sugar” dish- Buttermilk Pie ( 1 cup sugar)- to serve for our celebratory New Years Day dessert.

That’s the problem, of course. Too many celebrations, too few ways to celebrate. Having a birthday? Have some sugar! Christmas? Valentine’s Day? New Years? Company? Dinner? A snack? Are you, in fact, breathing? Have some sugar, sugar, sugar! Like so many things, it’s one of those items we take for granted, assuming we take in so much less of it that we actually do. As I’ve been mentally trying to prepare for this upcoming year, I’ve become acutely, increasingly aware of the ubiquity not just of high-fructose corn syrup (which is bloody everywhere) but indeed of sugar itself. Cane sugar, fructose, maple syrup, honey… have some sugar with your sugar, why don’t you? For most Americans, by the time they’ve gotten to the dessert, they’ve already had a dessert’s worth of sugar in their meal… they just don’t realize it.

So tonight we have our sayonara pie and start being good. Or not. After all- this is MY brilliant idea and I have still to completely convince the other members of the household, ages 40, 10 and 5. Wish me luck. Lots of it.

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Information About The No Sugar Project

 

The Very Best Milky Way

E.O. Schaub

Halloween is a tough one. It’s the only holiday I can think of that is so utterly centered on the joyful celebration of cheap candy. I mean, total junk. Every year my kids come home with an incredible assortment of not just the classics- Tootsie Rolls and Hershey bars, but some truly weird stuff: eyeball gumballs encircled by bulging veins, gummy cheeseburgers, packages of barbeque chips and unlabeled “mystery taffy.” The Halloween candy bag is the graveyard where crappy candy goes to die.

Even after a hefty parental culling and sorting process, it takes us months to get through so much as a small portion of their gargantuan haul, mostly because we adhere to a strict one-piece-per-night-and-maybe-not-even-then policy. It doesn’t help that I fully resent the role I am pulled into of being a spokesperson for the candy companies: I explain what each one is, impatient for them to choose so we can move on to our bedtime routine. “Snickers? well that has caramel and nuts inside. Three Musketeers? Well, it has this mush inside… I don’t know how to describe it. You just have to try it. Skittles? Well they’re like fruity M&Ms. Yes, they’re good! They’re all good! It’s candy for crying out loud!” How did I get roped into this, anyway?

Three days before Halloween this year I realized we still had half-full bags of last year’s candy in the back of our top pantry shelf and I, heaving a huge sigh of relief, finally pitched them into the trash without remorse. I have several friends who would likewise pitch the entire trick-or-treat business with similar enthusiasm. One family we know avoids the whole business altogether and just stays home, while others go out grudgingly, knowing full-well most of the evening’s proceeds will have a date with the garbage can before Thanksgiving rears its equally gluttonous head.

Me- I’m pretty conflicted about the whole thing. On the one hand, I have memories of trick-or-treating being one of the high-points of my childhood years, to the point that when my friends started deciding we were “too old” to go I was genuinely mystified and definitely disappointed. Why couldn’t we still go? Who doesn’t like to dress up in costumes? And get free candy? Instead we got cheap cans of shaving cream and— being too timid to assault any actual property— started spraying each other in the street. The cops showed up in about four seconds. Welcome to the suburbs. Continue reading The Very Best Milky Way